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Facing Divorce With An Autistic Child or Child With Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) in Florida

divorce with autistic children

TL;DR

  • Best interests rule: courts prioritize consistent therapies, school supports, and medical advice for ASD.
  • Evidence that matters: diagnosis documents, provider notes, and a clear history of attending appointments.
  • Get involved now: show up for therapy, IEP or school meetings, and medical visits to strengthen both care and your case.
  • Handle meltdowns calmly: use therapist strategies and avoid yelling since incidents can be used in court.
  • Rights and plans: same core custody and support rights, plus detailed parenting plans and sometimes special needs trusts.

Divorce Involving a Child With Autism: Common Legal Traps to Avoid

One of the most complex scenarios divorce attorneys near Orlando, Florida face today involves contested custody over children with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). When special needs are involved, standard custody strategies often fail. Both parents must adopt specific best practices to protect their case and ensure the child’s well-being.

Step One: Understanding the Diagnosis in a Florida Divorce

divorce involving children with autism spectrum disorderAutism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a broad diagnosis covering a wide range of symptoms and functional abilities. Understanding where your child falls on this spectrum is critical for the court.

  • Level I (High Functioning): Formerly known as Asperger’s syndrome, children at this level often have mild symptoms and are highly verbal but may struggle with social nuances.
  • Levels II & III (More Severe): Children with these diagnoses may be nonverbal or require significant assistance with basic daily tasks.

Regardless of severity, raising a child on the spectrum involves a demanding schedule of school meetings (IEPs), behavioral therapies, and appointments with specialists like neurologists. The court looks closely at who manages this “laundry list” of responsibilities.

The “Status Quo” Trap: How Your Routine Can Hurt Your Case

A common division of labor during marriage can become a major liability during a divorce involving autistic children.

It is normal for one spouse to work full-time while the other handles the majority of therapy appointments, doctor visits, and school coordination. However, once a Florida custody dispute begins, this routine can be weaponized.

The Conflict

When the working spouse files for equal time-sharing, the primary caregiver often objects. They may argue that the working parent is unfamiliar with the child’s specific sensory needs, triggers, or medical routines because they “never attended appointments.”

The Risk

While this division of labor was an agreed-upon norm during the marriage, in court, it can be framed as a lack of interest or capability. The allegation that one parent missed most appointments is technically true, making it a difficult argument to overcome without a strategic legal defense.

Addressing the Unique Needs of Children with Autism in Divorce and Custody Arrangements

Divorce can be particularly challenging when a child has special needs, such as autism or ADHD. These children often require unique accommodations, and the best interests of the child should always guide custody decisions. Here are two cases that highlight how special needs children were supported during a divorce.

Recent Case: Custody Battle for an Autistic Child

I recently represented a father whose ex-wife was making false claims that the child’s autism was not real, despite having a formal diagnosis from a physician. The mother refused to follow through with necessary accommodations, including therapy and educational programs designed for children on the autism spectrum.

The father filed for a modification of the custody arrangement, emphasizing that the child’s needs were not being met in the mother’s care. The case was complex, as the mother’s refusal to comply with medical advice and support the child’s developmental needs put the child at a disadvantage. Ultimately, the court sided with the father, modifying the custody arrangement to ensure that the child received the proper support they required.

What Should I Do if I Am About to Go Through a Divorce with an Autistic Child in FL?

The best rule of thumb is that if you are headed toward divorce and you have a child with autism spectrum disorder you will want to get involved with the child’s therapy, the school meetings which will likely occur monthly or quarterly, and doctors and other specialist appointments.

Any parent who has historically not been active in such care and treatment for an autistic child will face challenges in the custody case and any upcoming custody disputes involving a child with autism unless they show an immediate and substantial interest in the child’s therapeutic journey.

Here is another big trap to watch out for.

Another area of concern that arises in these types of cases stems from children on the spectrum and the tantrums or “meltdowns” that they often have.  Effects of divorce on even mildly autistic children can be significant -and being involved in therapy and learning coping mechanisms is important.

A child with ASD will often find it difficult to express their feelings or to understand their feelings which can lead to lengthy tantrums that can include screaming, hitting, punching walls, or even slapping or hitting themselves.

I have heard many stories of parents who tried to deal with these tantrums and ultimately lost their temper and began yelling and screaming at the autistic child who was in the middle of an autism meltdown.  Co-parenting an autistic child is very tricky, and its important to be as patient as possible during an autism meltdown and not to react in an angry way toward the child. First and foremost, it is because the meltdown is not the child’s fault. Secondly, you can bet that the other parent will bring up that incident in a mediation or a court hearing over custody.

If you need help with custody, co-parenting agreements or a divorce attorney near Windermere or other Orlando suburbs, give Sean a call today.

 

What Are My Rights As The Parent Of An Autistic Child In A Divorce in Florida

In Florida, parents of autistic children have the same fundamental rights as parents of neurotypical children in divorce proceedings. These rights include:

  • Right to custody: This encompasses both legal custody (decision-making rights regarding the child’s education, medical care, and well-being) and physical custody (time spent with the child).
  • Right to child support: The non-custodial parent is generally obligated to provide financial support for the child’s needs.
  • Right to visitation: Even if you don’t have primary physical custody, you have the right to spend time with your child.
  • Right to be involved in your child’s life: This includes attending important events like parent-teacher conferences and medical appointments.

However, when a child has special needs, including autism, there are additional considerations:

  • The court will prioritize the child’s best interests above all else. This means that the judge may consider factors such as the child’s needs, the child’s relationship with each parent, and the child’s stability when making custody and visitation decisions.
  • The court may order a parenting plan that outlines how the parents will share custody and make decisions about the child’s care. This plan may include provisions for the child’s ongoing therapies and medical needs.
  • If your child requires long-term care, the court may order that the parents contribute to a special needs trust to help cover future expenses.

Divorce With An Autistic Child

Divorce litigation involving children on the autism spectrum requires a heightened level of attention and strategy above and beyond a traditional case. While I have pointed out a couple of the most common areas of concern, there are countless others to be aware of.

For parents navigating these high-conflict and emotionally complex situations, working with one of the best divorce attorneys Orlando families trust for special-needs custody cases can make a meaningful difference in protecting both parental rights and a child’s long-term stability.

Any parent of a child on the spectrum who is going through a divorce where child custody is in dispute would benefit tremendously from having detailed conversations with the child’s therapeutic providers, doctors, and teachers, while simply following all advice offered by these professionals. This will usually benefit them tremendously in their divorce case and is highly recommended.

 

Sources:

https://www.autismspeaks.org/what-are-symptoms-autism

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